To everyone around me i think people see me as a really happy guy. I think they think im a goofball or something in those terms. but in reality i am miserable. I hate myself sometimes and i feel disgusted by myself. And yet everyday i put on a mask and pretend that my life is peachy and i have no troubles or woes in the world. See thats what i want people to think. I once read somewhere that if you try to fool yourself and everyone around you into believing your happy then maybe someday you will actually turn out happy. Thats what i do and its worked for the last couple of years, but its not anymore. I look at my life and see nothing. I have no one. I literally spent this whole entire weekend at home watching tv doing nothing. I has not one person call me and ask if i wanted to hang out with them or anything. How sad. Im nobody to everybody.